7th Time's a Charm?

Well, when I last left you I was in the midst of losing my 6th pregnancy. But something good did come from this-- Dr. J, a RE. My OBGyn was giving me the "maybe it's time to give up speech" when I asked her if I could be referred to a RE who deals with recurring pregnancy loss. A few months later I was sitting in Dr. J's office with the official diagnosis of "unexplained infertility", going over the plan for trying again.

Maybe I'm crazy.

No wait, I am. To a normal, sane person saying I'm going to try for the 7th time to have a healthy, successful pregnancy sounds completely absurd. Because in all odds, I will lose another baby... but Dr. J has given me the confidence to try again-- every test has been done, all normal except for the MTHFR and elevated ANA. All of the data has been analyzed, and he has made a plan. Femara CD3-7 to speed up ovulation. Intralipid infusions, lovenox, baby aspirin, folic acid, progesterone, the full court press he calls it. Ultrasound CD12 to see if there are any mature follicles ready to go. Trigger, um, *ahem, get DH involved in this process*, 2ww. Beta. Repeat Beta. Early ultrasound if positive. A plan. It's been awhile since I've had one of those.

I'm currently waiting to start cycling, but ya know since this is the first time in three years I've wanted CD1 to show up, she's not. And no, there is no possible way I'm pregnant. I was under strict doctor's orders not to be.

One year ago I was pregnant with Kaya. I can't believe it's been a year. I'm getting ready to do the SHARE Walk this weekend, and for the first time ever, my girls' names will be read together. I will hear their names out loud, and get to honor their memories. There isn't a day that goes by that my heart does not ache for them.

<3